St. Pauli Girl

Dead Fräulein 

Where to Dig Up More About This Beer

St. Pauli Girl Lager
St. Pauli Girl Brauerei
Bremen, Germany
Est. ???? (USA since 1965)
www.stpauligirl.com

Brain Damage Quotient = 4.9 % ABV
Fluid Oz. = 12.0 

Postmortem Brew Review
Pale yellow in color.
Non-complex in body and blend of ingredients.
Quick forming and disappearing head with virtually no lacing.
Watery mouth feel. 

Grim Reaper's Eulogy
Very unusual, this one...it says it's a Plisner on the website, but the front of the bottle says Lager!?! It's certainly not the ol' girl I knew in days of 'yore, when the likes of Lowenbrau & Beck's were the other big German beers on the block.

The website is great if you like some 'cheesecake' to go with your beer. But the two-fisted brau maiden with the frothy mugs, just doesn't seem to have that Reinheitsgebot. And at only $10.99 a 12 pack, it would seem she's gone from "high maintenance" to just another cheap date. It's like.....kissing your sister! Ugh.

Stella Artois

Dead Soldier

Where to Dig Up More About This Beer

Stella Artois
Brouwerijplein 1 (InBev)
Leuven, Belgium
Est.1366
www.stellaartois.com

Brain Damage Quotient = 5.0 % ABV
Fluid Oz. = 11.2 

Postmortem Brew Review
Sheer golden color.
Wonderful balance of hops and maltiness.
Creamy, frothy head with delicate spiderweb lacing.
Superb from start to finish. 

Grim Reaper's Eulogy
Like fine food, great artistry, avant garde movies and Champagne, you've got to hand it to the French for a truly great beer. Before they were known as "surrender monkeys", they took up shop in Belgium in the 14th century and created the original Belgian beer. So what if they can't fight a war worth a damn, save for the great Napoleon. This outstanding lager goes great with everything...um, except maybe frog's legs!

Leffe

Dead Soldier

Where to Dig Up More About This Beer

Leffe Belgian Abbey Ale - Blonde
Brouwerijplein 1 (InBev)
Leuven, Belgium
Est.1240
www.leffe.com

Brain Damage Quotient = 6.6 % ABV
Fluid Oz. = 11.2 

Postmortem Brew Review
Golden orange in color.
Fruity flavor in mouth.
Great mouthfeel; richness yet subtle and smooth.
Rich, frothy head with tremendous ringed lacing.
Full bodied with no bitter finish. 

Grim Reaper's Eulogy
"Savor the Mystery of the Ages" is printed on the back label. I don't know about you, but the Abbey style ales that I've sampled are always very very high in alcohol content. I guess when you have that much time on your hands, ahem, practicing celibacy, you can craft a great ale. Can you imagine if the church took beer and wine making away from these guys after already banning women??? Got to give them something to look forward to! A great delicate tasting ale that is not in the least bitter like some of the higher alcohol ales.

Check out their interactive website. It's like taking a beer SAT test!

Hoegaarden

Dead Soldier

Where to Dig Up More About This Beer

Hoegaarden Belgian White Wheat Beer
Brouwerij Hoegaarden (InBev)
Stoopkenstraat 46
Hoegaarden , Belgium
Est.1445
www.hoegaarden.com

Brain Damage Quotient = 4.9 % ABV
Fluid Oz. = 11.2 

Postmortem Brew Review
Cloudy yellow color as found in most wheat based beers.
Spice notes throughout.
Delicate, soapy head.
Light to medium bodied with good flavor and no bitter finish. 

Grim Reaper's Eulogy
This one claims to be the "original" Belgian wheat beer. Also states, "...brewed with spices...unfiltered, naturally cloudy..." on the label. All true statements of the drink I sampled. Typical of most wheat or wit-beers is that it uses the traditional ingredients of water, yeast, wheat, hops, coriander and dried Curaçao orange peel, also known as Laraha.

It is a wonderfully well balanced wheat beer and does not possess the 'wheatiness' of flavor found in other wit-beers. We've sampled the 'spade' in Spaten. Now we have the other tool from the shed; the Hoe! Can you dig it?

Harp Lager

Dead Soldier

Where to Dig Up More About This Beer

Harp Lager
Guinness Brewing Company
St. James Gate, Dublin, Ireland
Saint John, New Brunswick, Canada
Est.1759
www.guinness.com

Brain Damage Quotient = 4.6 % ABV
Fluid Oz. = 12.0 

Postmortem Brew Review
Golden, darker yellow color.
More hop than malt in balance.
Long, long, long lasting ring lacing.
Medium bodied. 

Grim Reaper's Eulogy
Guinness and Harp. Black and Tan. Half & half. This is 50% of that potent twin combo. On its own, Harp stands up with any other beer out there. Interestingly the product is now brewed on the other side of the pond in Canada; not Ireland. They are still true to the recipe.

So strike up the band, pop the top and relax with one of finest imbibements known to mankind. Take it from one who knows, me, the reaper...this is the stuff angels drink! Surely it's "the craic!"

Carlsberg Beer

Dead Soldier

Where to Dig Up More About This Beer

Carlsberg Beer
Carlsberg Brewery
Copenhagen, Denmark
Est.1847 (first brewed 1904)
www.carlsberg.com

Brain Damage Quotient = 4.6 % ABV
Fluid Oz. = 11.2 

Postmortem Brew Review
Clear, straw yellow color.
Aromatic hop notes.
Long lasting spiderweb lacing.
Light bodied.
Curiously sweet aftertaste. 

Grim Reaper's Eulogy
Not much on the label. No year of origin, no alcohol content. There's a standard "Government Warning" about the risks associated with drinking beer. Very unremarkable...

But don't judge this book by its cover! It is a very good beer with an unusual sweetness in the finish of each sip. I can't quite put my finger on that up-note at the end, but I like it. It's light enough not to weigh you down.

So who needs a lot of info on the bottle? After all, we're here to drink beer not to read it! However, if you do want to read all about this beer, I strongly suggest you go to their website. That's where they do all the explaining, as it's self titled, "Probably the Best Website in the World!"

Pilsner Urquell

Dead Soldier

Where to Dig Up More About This Beer

Pilsner Urquell
Plensky Prazdroj
Plzen, Czech Republic
Est.1842
www.pilsner-urquell.com

Brain Damage Quotient = 4.4 % ABV
Fluid Oz. = 12.0 

Postmortem Brew Review
Clear, transparent yellow color.
Smartly hopped.
Medium lasting head with good lacing.
Light in body and texture.
Wonderfully smooth finish. 

Grim Reaper's Eulogy
The best beer pun yet.....if their brew master was Steve Urkel, he'd surely say after one delicious sip, "Did I brew thaaaat?" This is the way a beer should taste; crisp, clean and refreshing. You'll want another and there will be room for it. The bottle labeling is all over the place, (just like Steve). It sports a gold foil neckband and the front has a faux wax seal. There's even a transparently clear label stating it's, "The Original Pilsner". Well one thing's for sure, Pilsner Urquell and Steve Urkel are both "originals". You'll be doing the Urkel dance after a 6 pack of these fine beers.